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Thursday, September 30, 2010

Ghar ka khaana zindabad

A Bong friend recently dragged me to have lunch at an eatery here in Aurobindo Street called 'Jubilee'. The chief attraction here is that the food served is 'just like what we once had at home'.

So, in a fancy setting we had 'home food', at less than homely prices. With each mouthful my friend was going over the moon, while I was wondering - as I chewed on rice with banana flower ki sabzi - whether there were any leftovers in my fridge.

OK - it wasn't THAT bad but really, I wouldn't have wanted to pay 500 bucks for a meal like that. Because I am not from Calcutta and it did not bring back any fond memories.

But it set me thinking... The wheel has turned full circle.

When we were kids, going to a restaurant was the ultimate treat. It happened only a couple of times an year - on birthdays and anniversaries or even guests coming from outside. (In fact, we waited for such Bhagwaan's to come) and we'd usually visit only Nataraj or Neelam or for that matter if the the Devtas or Devis were that great, we would move to Shilpi which was an open air restaurant or may be sometimes Park View. But those were days you looked forward to.

But the tide turned when we moved out of the circumference of mom's cooking - and started living on our own. Cut to the present. After years of trial and error I have (at last) learnt to take care of the daily 'paapi pet ka sawaal'. I carry a dabba to office, and usually eat at home.

Of course we still do eat out a couple of times a week to:
a) Catch up with friends over a meal.
b) Try out some new place/ kind of food - for the experience.

Home economics
I think 'ghar ka khaana' will be the Next Big Luxury for many of us. As two-income families mushroom the question is - will they survive on ready-to-eat/ junk food/ Udipi meals?

Pondy has always had enterprising ladies who send lunch and even dinner dabbas with home-cooked food. But I think the next step is actually a chain of take-aways, located in office complexes/ malls from where you can pick up home-cooked mix n match meals.


So you could pick up 6 chapatis, 100 gms alu-tamatar ki sabzi and 100 gms moong ki daal + some dahi on your way home - enough for a couple.

The smart thing would be to have - the way dabba ladies do - a variety of cuisine. ie Gujarati, Punjabi, south Indian - more styles depending on demand.

Someone will of course have to study how to make on a mass scale food that tastes just like ghar ka. While no two moms cook alike, there is a generally accepted spectrum in which home food falls.

The menu would be more 'pedestrian' - tindi, turai, alu-gobi, tuar daal. Even if there's paneer - it would be home-style and not swathed in heavy gravies and spices like restaurants normally serve.

I read somewhere that Food Bazaar has started something similar on an experimental basis all over India, but haven't had a chance to visit. If anyone has - and can vouch for taste/ hygiene do lemme know!

I think custom has been dying a slow death in most walks of life ever since mankind got Henry Forded...and all ghars are not blessed with this aura of ghar ka khana.... some ghars .. they avoid khana :)and best are the mothers / wives who know how to plan their menu... so that their charges... keep asking for more... forever 

Reminds me of this little place tucked away in one of the busy by-lanes in Madras which serves food in small take-away-friendly portions. I think it is called The Spicy and is purely geared towards office deliveries, serving (almost) homemade Gujarati stuff like theplas and khichdi with kadhi, etc. Even those who wanted to 'eat-in' were served in the same Styrofoam boxes.

Talking of pay-by-weight, there is a Saravana Bhavan also which has got a buffet-by-weight concept ('don't load your plate and then waste, we'll charge you for refills only by weight, thank you'). OK, if economy is the criteria then you are better off doing the unlimited meals in the ground-floor dining hall at the other Saravana Bhavans.

Ad world mein DHOOM....

Last night I saw year 2004's megahit Dhoom. What struck me was :"If only Yashraj films had reflected on what they did right with Dhoom - and done the same with Bunty aur Babli".

Dhoom was hyped as a boys n bikes film and lived upto that promise. It was cops vs robbers story where we weren't given much time to think. No background info on WHY John Abraham is a bad guy or why Abhishek is a good one. Bas, they are what they are - you just sit back and enjoy the high speed chase sequences. And for the comic element there was Uday Chopra.

Another smart thing was the using just a few really good songs and repeating them several times through the film. The same would've worked wonders for Bunty aur Babli.

Ad-ding it all up
But what this post is really about is John Abraham. In the year since Dhoom's release this guy's stars have really started shining brightly. He was, in fact, the reason the girls went to see the film (Abhishek bhi hai, par is picture mein John pretty much overshadows him). Casting him was a very good idea - he fit the role to a 'T'.

Now, John is the new hot favourite for product endorsements. He was endorsed for :
a) Wrangler jeans
b) Titan Fastrack eye gear
c) Yamaha bikes

All the products are good fits with his image and personality. Especially Yamaha - because the ad he features in is promising the 'next revolution' in biking . John adds source credibility as a guy with a passion for bikes even off-screen.

Now one just hopes he does not go and sign up a dozen more commercials and ruin it all. Being an ex-advertising guy (he was a media planner with Enterprise advertising before ramp modelling and films beckoned) I think John has the right fundas on how to manage his personal positioning. And I hope that good sense prevails over greed.

Really, seeing Prerna (of Kasautii fame) in a B grade commercial for P P Design Estate or Salman Khan plugging Dollar Club banians you have to wonder... Surely certain kinds of endorsements end up costing you more in image terms than they earn you in cash!

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Bunty aur Babli

This is one topic i wanted to write on. Talking of films, this was one flick where a sorts of  Fun + message = confusion

Once in a while, I took this opportunity to spend three hours in an a/c theater away from office "doing office ka kaam"- watching Bunty and Babli.

In my review for the movie, I was rather charitable. I gave the film 3.5 out of 5. The thing is, I went to see B&B with a very positive disposition. Given the colourful and kitschy publicity campaign, the rap song with Big B and the Bonnie and Clyde inspired premise I was expecting a fun and frothy film. Which it was - but only in parts.

Borrowing a line from Bunty's philosophical musings in the film - "Yeh jo world hai na, isme do kism ki films hoti hain - good aur verry good". Bunty aur Babli, unfortunately was merely good, not great.

Rakesh a.ka. Bunty from Fursatganj and Vimmi a.k.a Babli from Pankinagar are small town kids with bigtime dreams. While Bunty thinks he too can be a Tata-Birla or Ambani, Vimmi aspires to be a Miss India. They set out in search of fame and fortune, but end up having more fun playing 'con banega crorepati'. By the intermission, Bunty and Babli have fallen in love and marry.

Now here's the problem - from a con caper the film degenerates into pyaar-mohabbat, melodrama and unnecessary song sequences shot in Switzerland (yes, I know it's a Yashraj film but still!)

Post interval, the bidi-smoking, chana-chewing policeman Dashrath Singh (Amitabh Bachchan) is hot on their trail... Now the plot gets thicker (and I mean that not just literally but in terms of the IQ level). Bunty and Babli pull of the mother of all cons with the 'sale of the Taj mahal'.

Unfortunately the way in which it was executed was really not very interesting. It was neither intelligently funny nor slapstick funny. (Except for the bit where a pointless morcha is staged outside the tourism minister's house - that's hilarious!)

Fun + message = confusion
Actually, throughout the film the audience was merely smiling - not laughing full throatedly. Which kind of tells you something.

The makers of Bunty and Babli wanted to make something more 'meaningful' kind of mindless comedy ie They wanted the film to reflect the aspirations of small town India, the clash of values - izzat aur sharaafat vs quick and easy money which youngsters want today.

Yet, in attempting this duality (comedy + message) they did not end up with a product as endearing as Munnabhai MBBS (which I think can be watched again and again). Bunty aur Babli was well marketed and packaged and given the star cast (the Abhishek-Rani pair really rocked on-screen) - to be a hit. But it never went down in the annals of Bollywood as a 'classic'.

Highs and lows
The scene where Amitabh and Abshihek are sitting at a bar and 'Umrao Jaan' is suggestively playing in the background. Aishwarya appears in an Umrao Jaan-type outfit and shakes her booty. Really - it should be edited out!

And Rani, who looked lovely otherwise, should have taken care not to bare her less-than-flat tummy.

Amitabh and Abhishek on-screen together, incidentally, was one of the highlights of the film. But though Amitabh played his role well, you can't help but feel he doesn't come across as a 'bumbling' cop. Paresh Rawal might have done the bumble bit better. Big B was part bumble, part sinister. Which is a bit confusing for the audience.

Net: net - the movie had a fair bit of flaws but was nevertheless watchable. I only wish as much imagination had gone into scripting the cons as went into Babli's clothes (which are simply amazing).

By the way, the 'disputed' outfit (which Suneet Varma accused designer Aki Narula of plagiarising) was seen on screen for all of 5 seconds.

Bottomline: I may have given the film only 2.5 had it not been for the last 5 minutes - when the scriptwriter redeemed himself. Just for that - an extra star. And given that Dhoom was getting a sequel - I think room had been left for a part 2 here as well.

No flavour in the Koffee

The newspapers hit the final nail on the head when they dissected what went wrong with the grand finale of Koffee with Karan.

All that happened was Shahrukh Khan sucked up to Amitabh - "aap kitne mahaan hain". Why can't he be asked some tough questions for a change?

Because in Bollywood everybody has to scratch each other's backs. Just that doing so in public does not make for interesting television.

And it went against the spirit of the show. In contrast to the saccharine sweet "Rendezvous with Simi Garewal" Karan Johar did - to an extent - put his guests in the dock. He asked some 'tough' questions (by Bollywood standards) - but in a way that no one took offence. The rapid-fire round , for example, was rather fun.

The stars who were most comfortable with him - like Kareena, Rani, Preity, Saif, Shahrukh and Kajol - shared a little more of themselves than they normally would have. They gave more honest answers to the usual questions - and appeared more human.

Now if only the finale could have lived upto the same high standards. Instead of icing on the cake it ended up feeling like crumbs.

Jobhop, skip and jump

Jack Welch spent his entire career at GE. Like my father, who retired after a 36 year stint at St. Pauls H.S.S. School as an Economics HOD, the same school where i studied.

That kind of career graph is pretty much extinct. Most young people are going to go through several jobs in their lifetime - for the right and the wrong reasons. The way I look at it...

There are two ways to grow the talent pool in your company: coach it or poach it. You achieve the first by hiring bright young men and women who earnestly seek a challenging career with your company. 

The second involves cutting short the careers of bright young (and not-so-young) men and women in the neighbouring company, by offering a greater challenge at your own.

Lekin phir aajkal dull but secure jobs hain kahaan ? "Niji naukri mein na izzat hain, na mazza, aur na matlab". Isn't that what we all want from a career - and life in general. 

A comment on comments

It's a little over 3 months since I started blogging. I never knew it would be so addictive - or fun. Or that I had so much to write about!

I like people reading my blog and leaving behind comments. But - as many of you have noticed there are none.

Why? Well, it was a policy decision of sorts when I started blogging. A way of limiting the amount of time and energy spent on the activity.

But policies can and do change. And hence, I have decided not to ask for comments - as and when the junta feels it may add some value.

Also, I have decided to allow "anonymous" comments. If I put my name with my opinion - you need to too :)

Let there be fight !!

Newspapers are nowadays just like cockroaches, popping up every now and then from everywhere with competition and rivalry with each other. Almost all the famous and infamous get all the due attention and then its finally the newspapers again who decide whos' to be in the limelight off and on.

Of course that is an exaggeration - even the most strident TOI basher would be unable to produce a real-life example of Miss India on the sports page. But perception is reality and the endless plugging of Miss India in almost every other part of the paper makes it dig a good one.

Magar karega kya?
The question however is - what is it that the newspapers promise? Full coverage of glamour/ parties/ Miss India/ Bollywood?

Much as many people profess to dislike newspapers these days, its subject matter has become part of what you expect from a paper. Almost all the leading dailies have a supplement which compete with any other supplements circulating in the country more or less on exactly the same lines.

We do want to know what Mallika Sherawat wore at Cannes and perhaps even whose wedding lehenga weighed 10 kilos. And for the few who don't - on every front, whether local or international coverage dailies have pulled up their socks and are now actually quite readable products.

If the imminent threat of competition can result in such a bonanza, wonder what happens when the competition actually arrives? From Rs 4 a day for our morning paper, we will probably start paying Rs 1.

An extra visit to a restaurant can probably be had from the money thus saved!

"Surprise yourself. Surprise everyone."

Slim shady ?

Wondered if 'slim' jeans can really make you look thinner? The surprising answer is YES!

Of course if you're shaped like Tun-tun they won't transform you into Priyanka Chopra. But, if you're a normal human being with a few extra bulges here and there, the L591 fit will do some streamlining. And hence make you look - and feel - slimmer.

'Slim jeans' is a return to the skin-tight jeans of the early to mid 90s. The kind Urmila wore in Rangeela. The wheel turns full circle after a decade of anti-fits and flares. Though of course, those who like those styles can continue wearing them.

Kya Kool Hain Hum?

Levi's is not THE brand for young people in developed markets because they don't really want to be seen in the same jeans worn by their parents. In the 50s and 60s it was rebellious for middle class America to wear a garment associated with blue collar workers. Now it's cool to be seen in rap and hip hop clothing worn by blacks.

However in India, it's still cool to own a Levi's. Of course they had an early I-want-that-brand advantage but additionally it's strived really hard to create and maintain a trendsetter image in the youth fashion market.

Not all the trends Levi's has attempted to spark off actually caught fire. But a few did. Like cargoes. Then Levi's moved on to engineered jeans (did not take off), low rise (major hit ) and now slim-fit (looks like a winner).

Somewhere in between they also had detachables and reversibles - interesting but with more of novelty than lasting value.

The trouble with being a trend setter is you have to cash in on your trend really quick, before every other jeans manufacturer starts offering it at reduced prices, and you have to keep inventing new trends. Or, ressurect old ones but make them look like something new and hip.

Incidentally, the choice of Bipasha as the 'slim jeans' model is a master stroke. The once well endowed (some would say chubby!) star just lost 10 kgs (through diet and exercise). The ad every-so-subtly suggests you'll do the same. Just by wearing those jeans...

Kabhi khushi, Kabhi birthday

Hum bhi agar bachche hote
Hum bhi agar bachche hote
Naam hamara hota Taplu Paplu
Khaane ko milte laddoo
Aur duniya kehti
"Happy Birthday to you"


There is a time in life when you live for your next birthday. Children are always in that mode. They get excited about their 'big day', which may be many months away!

This 'I-wish-I -could-grow-up-as-soon-as-possible' phase generally lasts till you're 16, or 18, or 21 - depending on whether you find being grown up a pleasant role or unpleasant responsibility. At the very outer limit, most people enjoy and look forward to their birthday until they turn 25.

After that comes a phase from 25-30 in which every advancing year brings with it a sense of foreboding. The latest teen pop sensation or upset winner at Wimbledon is a full decade younger... And where are you??

You start getting those cheeky cards reminding you to forget about your advancing age. Opticians and acquaintances on social networks remember your birthday while your childhood friends - now living continents away- suffer from amnesia.

You don't feel like celebrating really - what is there to be happy about? But a bunch of people will call to wish you and there has to be an answer to the question: "So what's the plan for the big day?"

Finally, the 'worm turns' when you actually hit 30. You realise things are not so bad after all. In fact, you have less pimples than you did at 16 - and now have the means to undergo expensive 'skin glow' treatments, if that is still a bother.

Taking a leaf from Karan Johar's book I'd say "it's all about loving yourself". And for me at least that happened after the big Three O. The feeling of being comfortable in my own skin. Of being able to trust my own instincts. Of listening to what others have to say but not being bound by their approval.

Would not trade that to be 'sweet (and confused) 16 again'!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Star Wars (finally) did it !!

Special Message From George Lucas


“In a few short hours, many of you will have the greatest cinematic experience of your lives. This movie has been over 28 years in the making. When Star Wars first became a glimmer in my eye, I knew that the final episode of the prequels would be one of the defining moments in the history of motion pictures.

Shadow and I have slaved for nearly three years on this one. Revenge of the Sith has all the darkness and foreboding of The Empire Strikes Back. It has all the escapism and excitement of Return of the Jedi and it has all the wonder and magic of the very first Star Wars film."


I have to agree there - Star Wars Episode 3 rocked. And I say this despite not being a 'true fan'. I saw the original Star Wars series years after it was released - on the small screen and that too in the 80's, and when you view a movie a decade after its time it can never have quite the same impact.

George Lucas decided to film the prequels to the sacred trilogy because in the late 90s he felt that CGI technology had finally made it possible to make a Star Wars film which fully recreated his original vision, without artistic compromises.

No doubt Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones were spectacular in terms of their graphics, special effects, action sequences - all that jazz. But they simply lacked the emotional involvement viewers felt with Luke, Hans Solo, r2d2, Yoda.

There was an array of new and some old characters but the connection with the original films was tenuous at best.

Episode 3 however changed all that. Finally you get to see how and why Anakin succumbs to the 'Dark Side'. Why he needs to wear that horrendous Darth Vader outfit with the 'Stephen Hawking' voicebox. And so on and so forth.

Old vs the new
Of course, the accompanying visual spectacle is also a treat. Yoda in a light-sabre sequence is the kind of action you could never have seen in the pre-computer era. Yet, I think perhaps the untechnological Yoda had a lot more class.

Incidentally, the person who created the 'Yoda' puppet back then used Albert Einstein's wrinkled face as a reference.

Because there were so many limitations, and no technology that time, Lucas and his team had to rely on extreme inventiveness and ingenuity in the original series. They had a will - and found the way. And that added something special to the whole effort.

That's why the film blew the socks off the world when it was first launched. It was a timeless good vs evil; father vs son story. And it created a new genre of films and a whole new way of film-making.

As an article in the Guardian notes:
Lucas was painstaking in his attention to special effects, and insisted the film be made in the then newly-developed Dolby Sound, giving its battles a thunderous resonance. With its opening scene, as a giant Empire battle-cruiser swooped over the audience's heads after Princess Leia's tiny spaceship, film goers were hooked. As one critic put it: 'No make-believe time and place had ever been created with such magnificence or microscopic attention to detail. It was mind-blowing.'

At the end of Episode 3 you really want to go back and watch the original series again in the theatres. But I don't know - they might seem tacky in the special effects department to an audience now used to better.

The only way to take care of that was to refilm the episoded 4,5 and 6 but that really made no sense. There were some rumours about sequels being filmed though - but could be just the wish-projection of rabid fans.

Passion Paid
Star Wars was also the story of how one man who believed in what he was doing successfully rebelled against the rules of film making in Hollywood.

As one fan website recalled :
Every single studio in Hollywood passed on the project except for 20th Century Fox. Fox gave Lucas $ 10 million to make what is perhaps the most influential film in the history of cinema. Fox released Star Wars Episode 4: A New Hope in May 1977... By the end of its first theatrical run, Star Wars was the most successful film in North American history with a gross in excess of $ 290 million.

The amazing thing was - Lucas never doubted what he was doing. That's why instead of money upfront, he negotiated for control.

He asked for the rights to the final cut of the film, 40% of the net box-office gross, all rights to future sequels and ownership of all the merchandising rights associated with Star Wars... At the time, science fiction films were not very profitable. Hence, Fox thought they were ripping Lucas off... In the end, this deal would eventually make Lucas a billionaire and cost Fox an untold fortune in lost revenues.

There's a lesson in there for all of us!

The Man behind the Magic
Not to say Lucas is THE ultimate in film making. He had his human weaknesses. An article in one of the magazines called him "a man who prefered working with special effects to working with human beings".

In the past he had chosen to work with unknown actors, whom he could then fill with his own ideas... While Hollywood's other creative geniuses staked their success on writing and directing talents, Lucas' brilliance was due at least in part to his wizardry as a film editor.

Like many such genuises he paid a heavy price in his personal life. Immediately after 'Return of the Jedi' released he also went through a painful divorce. It appeared that he poured all his energy and passion into his work - and his wife could not take it.

With his fortune Lucas decided to build his own Xanadu, 6,000 acres of Skywalker ranch, in Marin County, north of San Francisco, which would have its own studios and editing suites, and began development in the mid-Eighties, expecting his wife Marcia, an accomplished film editor who had worked on Star Wars, to take over its running. She rebelled. 'He was all work and no play,' she complained.

She wanted trips to Europe, he wanted to build an empire. As Biskind says: 'Success was winding Lucas tighter and tighter into a workaholic, control-driven person.' Marcia had an affair. They filed for divorce, and she took $50m of his fortune (now reckoned to be worth around $2 billion). He was crushed. Divorce was for Hollywood, not the scion of small-town America.


Behind every great work of art/ labour of love/ magnificent passion is an incredible story of success, and small and great sacrifices !

May the Force be with us all!

Sense and Sensitivity

A graduation ceremony is one of the few rituals a young country like America can truly call its own. A typical American kid may go through several graduations in one lifetime - kindergarten, middle school, high school and then college (one ceremony for every degree you earn).

As rituals go. I think it's a great one. You actually feel a sense of achievement, tinged with the sorrow of leaving a well loved and familiar bunch of buildings and buddies. A must say that it's a time when emotions run high' and the mandatory commencement address - generally delivered by a distinguished personality - is meant to give a pat-on-the-back send-off to the graduating class.

Commencement speeches are thus designed to impart wisdom with wit. To inspire, to uplift, to exhort - go forth and conquer. Well, at least that's what the good speakers do. The rest drone on while students get hot and sweaty in their ceremonial gowns.

P V Narasimha Rao - God bless his soul - was one such dull speaker. But he was the Prime Minister once, so having him to address an audience was a kick of sorts.

The good, the bad and the 'ugly'
Ideally, students want a speech like the famous 'Wear sunscreen' one by 'Kurt Vonnegut' at MIT. The speech was actually an article written by Mary Schmich for the Chicago Tribune. But that's another story.

It used to be statesmen and academicians who delivered commencement speeches. Now, Bono and Oprah Winfrey also get to do the honours. As does eBay founder Pierre Omdiyar.

I think that's good. Successful from every walk of life have valuable insights to share. Nora Ephron (of 'Sleepless in Seattle' and 'You've got mail' fame), speaking at Wellesley, urged: "Whatever you choose, however many roads you travel, I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there." Good advice, I think!

Conan O'Brien dwelled on his failures because "as graduates of Harvard, your biggest liability is your need to succeed.... Because success is a lot like a bright, white tuxedo. You feel terrific when you get it, but then you're desperately afraid of getting it dirty, of spoiling it in any way."

O Brien is a Harvard graduate - so he can say just about anything in his self deprecating style and get away with it. Indra Nooyi learnt otherwise.

What she said and what she probably didn't mean
Indra Nooyi's address focused on the need for the graduates of Columbia Business School to be culturally sensitive, in the context of the global economy. If you read the text of the speech, which can be downloaded in pdf format from the Pepsi website, as an Indian you won't find anything offensive.

But I can understand why some Americans did. Indra may perceive herself as 'American' but the colour of her skin and country of birth still make her a 'foreigner who's done well' as far as (a section of) right-wing America is concerned.

And hence, comparing America to being the world's 'middle finger' was not the best of analogies. It was culturally insensitive of Nooyi - unintentionally so. But nevertheless.

Perhaps she was inspired by the 'paanch ungliyon se mutthi banti hai' (five fingers make a fist) which is a common Indian metaphor. But the metaphor was kind of forced (South America as the 'sensual ring finger' - kinda silly). Besides, you can't speak of 5 continents and then in North America only count the USA. That's insensitive too.

As someone commented on Sepia Mutiny , Columbia students may even take offence because of the very nature of their program - extremely cosmopolitan.

" Surely Ms. Nooyi understood, prior to accepting the engagement, that Columbia is among the most cosmopolitan of the premier business school programs. Of the class she addressed, 28% were not even Americans to begin with, and it's likely that a majority of the American listeners have significant international experience and are multilingual. Each year, top students select Columbia for its location in the most cosmopolitan city on the planet and for the breadth and excellence of its international offerings."

The fall out
"I stand before you awed, humbled and honored to be here," is how Indra Nooyi began her speech at Wharton a couple of years ago. So I don't think it's arrogance, just bad judgement.

And bad luck that a few students who didn't like what they heard went and blogged about it. And from there the story has hit Indian headlines (the New York Times has not picked it up yet, but might!).

Meanwhile, she's put up an explanation/apology in the Pepsi website too.

What I think happened is that Indra just got carried away. The 'five fingers' sounded like a good metaphor, and maybe coming from an all-American, white, born-and-bred in the US kind of CEO it would not have been misconstrued. Coming from Conan O Brien, for example, the 'middle finger' analogy would even have been funny.

It's like L K Advani saying, Muslim personal law needs reform - Muslims will be up in arms. If Javed Akhtar says it, many might listen. It's a question of 'source credibility'.

Like beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, offence is in the ears of the listener...

Bottomline: Who are 'they' to tell us how we should think/ act/ behave? In making a point about America as an American, Indra has learnt that to some Americans she will always be a 'they'. Meanwhile, we in India - and the media especially - think and refer to her as 'one of us'. A tough situation to be in, isn't it?

But then Indra is one tough lady!

Thirst among equals

The cola wars are an annual entertainment fixture. Some years back, both Coke and Pepsi launched their summer campaigns - and junta had one more topic to debate in canteens and commuter trains - kaun sa ad achcha hai?

For years, in India, Pepsi was the more creative advertiser. Then, Coke and the Aamir-Ashutosh team came up with the 'thanda matlab' series. It was a runaway hit. Meanwhile, Pepsi struggled on, changing its winning 'dil maange more' tagline to the more literal 'yeh pyaas hai badi'.

In 2005, the tables turned once again. Coke ads lost their fizz. Aamir as Manno Bhabhi wasn't getting wah-wahs. The sequel, where Aamir played Manno bhabi AND the servant Dinu kaaka was an even bigger damp squib.

Pepsi's 'Oye Bubbly' wasn't winning universal acclaim - but, it had a catchy jingle. And Shahrukh Khan. In a world where celebrities wax and wane, Pepsi was lucky to have SRK on their side. A man who always seems to stay on the right side of the audience.

Does it matter?
At the end of the day, I don't think cola advertising really influences drinking habits. Based on taste, there are distinct preferences. I like Coke (sweeter, more fizzy), others may prefer Pepsi or Thums Up.

But at the end of the day if Coke is not available, I'll take Pepsi instead. As would most cola drinkers.

What the cola wars do is keep interest alive in the category as a whole. What's more disturbing for cola companies is that their drinks are being perceived as unhealthy and/ or full of empty calories.

A recent survey conducted asked the junta (109 girls, 114 boys, aged 15-24) to complete the following sentences:
If I'm hot and thirsty I'll probably pick up a...

51% of the girls answered - Water!
Only 23% said 'soft drink', with nimbu pani and fruit juice coming in 3rd and 4th

On the other hand, 'soft drink' was the top choice for boys (37%) followed by water (24.6%), nimbu pani and (!) beer.

Reacting to the new wave of calorie consciousness. both Coke and Pepsi introduced diet versions. Personally, I hate the after taste of diet drinks and would rather go for the cola. But I know plenty of young people will be quite happy to go diet.

Alternatives
However, both Pepsi and Coke are getting into juice, and flavoured water - just to hedge their bets. If folks do actually shift from colas, they should shift to healthy drinks offered by them!

That's the reason Pepsi bought out Tropicana a few years ago for $ 3 billion (Coke owns Minute Maid). And they also bought juice and water companies in Europe.

In India, Pepsi and Lipton introduced bottled ice tea. Amul launched 'spicy buttermilk' in a tetrapak (Rs 5 only). While Godrej relaunched its almost-defunct XS brand with trendier packaging and exotic flavours.

The battle to quench our thirst just got hotter. Dil maange more (colas) or dil maange aur (healthier drinks) - that is the million rupee question. I think it will be a mix of both.

Variety after all is the spice of life. You know colas aren't 'good' for you but well, that's part of the attraction. All health and no fun would make Jai a dull boy, wouldn't it?

Hakim Tarachand

There are some songs you catch on the radio or while randomly flipping channels which make you stop and want to listen. 'Hakim Tarachand' is one such.

When I first heard it on '93.5 Fm' the voice reminded me a bit of 'Babuji'. The singer however was Shibani Kashyap, a good looking woman with a decent voice but one who's not really made a big impact on the Indian pop scene.

Of course, 'Hakim Tarachand zaraa kothe pe aa ja' is a line which you can't really ignore. No doubt a folk song, perhaps the kind sung before weddings. It's naughty, without being cheap. And earthy as well.

A stout and mustachioed Hakimji being wooed into the world of sin is far more interesting than dance-and-prance routines of overly endowed, under-dressed girls. As is the general trend in today's remix videos. So much the norm that it no longer shocks nor titillates.

Bottomline: Just one huge song is enough to elevate a singer to a whole new status. Alisha lived off 'Made in India', while Sunita Rao had just that one song -'Pari hoon main'. Hakim Tarachand,  just was Shibani's ticket to the bigtime. But all vanished without a trace. Some times they appear to pop out their heads out of the mud like frogs in the rains. Still more yippies and hippies are appearing on the scene. Let's wait and watch.

A question of questions

Summer sees scores of young people trudging the length and breadth of cities these days, filling out questionnaires. With the exponential rise in B schools and courses like BMM and BMS which favour internships, every Tom , Dick and Harry is doing a summer project. And the project you're most likely to be handed is a 'survey'.

Surveys serve two important functions:
a) They get the trainee out of the boss' hair for most of the duration of the project. This is important because few companies have extra seating space or computers for trainees.

b) The survey, if sincerely done, just might reveal something of use to the client or agency which they can further investigate. The operative word is IF, because survey forms are rarely administered or completed as they should be.

This happens for two reasons:
a) Idiot questionnaires: The survey is 7 pages long and the respondents lose interest by page 2. Asking people to rank and rate 7 attributes on 5 parameters is a pointless exercise but one which the designers of surveys nevertheless insist on.

So the student has no choice but to hurry through the survey, taking down a few answers, guessing/ making up responses to a few others before capturing the most crucial data: name, address and tel no.

Crucial because based on this info, the boss may randomly conduct a back-check - to ensure that the respondents are not a figment of the imagination, and that they were actually questioned. Which is true, but does not reveal the whole story.

b) Lazy/ unethical behaviour: Where there's a will, there's a loophole. And smart (lazy) students know fully well to exploit it. Many students are given a daily 'target' of forms to fill out. Others are paid on a per form basis (this is especially true of undergrads who work directly for market research agencies for pocket money, not experience).

Hence, however decent the questionnaire may be, these students are in a situation where dil maange more.

But sometimes, a questionnaire can be tuned topsy-turvy. The 3 page, 7 minute questionnaire can be reduced to a 1 1/2 page, 3 minute job. Smart people simply skip over page 2 and braze enough to smile and assure, "Don't worry, I'll fill out the rest myself".

Of course, many agencies use the exercise more to collect a database of names and addresses to subsequently market their newspaper or products. But what about companies who consider market research to be the 'holy grail'? And there are plenty of them...

Survey strategies
As an MBA student too goes around doing a survey for a summer projects working at some top company for projects like Surf Ultra vs Ariel many learn for the first time that there are a number of attributes to a survey who do it sincerely.

Eventually these candidates learn the Great Indian Survey Trick. The single most efficient way to get respondents is in the second class compartment of any local train. The trick is to do it at non-peak time. Beats going house to house and having doors slammed on their face - and they get a completely random sample.

Good deed for the day
Having 'been there, done that', many experienced  people have on more than one occasion filled out surveys for forlorn looking trainees. Invariably, however, I find the questionnaires are badly designed/ worded and administered with minimum enthusiasm.

Sure, market research is a grueling and thankless job but treating it as a punishment only makes things worse.

If you're trudging around with a survey in hand this summer, see it as opportunity. To smile at random strangers, to connect with them for a few minutes. And also to deal with rejection, even rudeness, yet not take it personally. To live, to learn, to grow.

I know, I did.

Zig 'n' zag II

When I think of a life with zig and zag the name that comes to mind is Tony Ritzgerfield. This was a guy I met here a few months back. I had been to Auroville on an official meeting, he was on the final leg of a one and a half year discovery-of-the-world trip.

Tony was from New Zealand, a country where it is not unusual to chuck a well paying job at Cadbury's to fulfill ones wanderlust. Which is what he had done. After spending a few months in Africa (where his expensive camera was stolen), and South East Asia, he traveled the length and breadth of India.

At the end of it, he was down to almost his last penny. He took a local train to Madras, single bag in hand. In London, he had friends - and was to collect insurance money for the stolen equipment. And he seemed so cool, confident and unconcerned about the future - I couldn't help but envy him.

So I'll say once again, it's not about money. It's a cultural thing. I also wanted to be a bunch of 'different' things. Like be a rally driver for a while, then spend a month or two traveling around India (alone). Neither of the plans materialized.

The travel bit was shot down by my parents. Instead of being a rally driver i started working. It paid peanut ka chhilkas, but allowed me to stay connected to my first love - writing.

It's your life but...

Of course, had I been more strong-willed, had I been more of a rebel... Things would have been different. But I cared for 'approval'. As most of us in India seem to.

Approval comes from following the rules laid down in society. The rewards of following these rules are that you enjoy the warm cocoon of family, which an individualist like Tony probably does not.

And of course, in their own way, parents are right. Life in India is a struggle. If you take off for 6 months someone will replace you and you may have to start from lower down the ladder again. You can't take even a basic upper middle class lifestyle for granted. You have to claw your way to a 'good job' and then hang onto it.

Family is social security - emotional too. Which is why you think a million times before doing anything which may upset the applecart.

As we get more economically secure, this may change. But cultural influences are quite deep rooted - so it will take a generation or two to strike the right balance.

The other side
On the other hand, one can argue that 'backpacking' for a firang is an activity pursued, at least partially, for approval. Everybody's doing it - you do it too.

So much so that backpackers who start out thinking they're going to 'discover' a new country and culture simply walk down the path set down by the Lonely Planet guidebook. So in Mumbai they stroll down Causeway, eat at Leo or Mondy's, visit the dhobi ghat and chor bazaar.

And in Goa or Manali, stay in 'backpacker hotels' which serve muesli and banana pancakes for breakfast. And only take in other white skinned residents.

The other point is that travel is something that a lot of young people in the Western world experiment with at some point. But then settle down to predictable lives. It's only a small minority that 'lives to travel'.

As Vicky, another student from Tasmania puts it:
"Forget having kids, buying houses etc: travel light. So many people, not that much older than us, seem so full of regret about the things they never did and places they never went to, and now probably never will. Their lives just seem so empty.

I don't think I could wait until retirement: I could get knocked over by a bus tomorrow. In other words, carpe diem! When people tell us to settle down it seems a bit like a conspiracy: are they jealous that they're stuck with 20-year mortgages and time-consuming children?"


I'm just saying if you are born in India but would like to be a Tony, you should have the choice. Currently, it doesn't seem like we do.

Adding some zig to your zag

BPOs are roping in foreign students to work for them in India, reports the TOI. "Sources said this was being done to overcome the accent problem faced by Indian call centres".

And especially so in case of European clients who require French or Spanish speakers.

The foreign students are paid the same salaries as their Indian counterparts. The bait : a chance to live and travel in India. "We try to attract students who are just out of college by showcasing India's rich cultural heritage," says Liam Brown, president and CEO, Intergron - a US headquartered BPO.

Live to learn
It's not clear what culture or heritage these students will experience if they're working on night shifts and sleeping off their days. But that in itself will be an experience and firangs are big on experience. They aren't as concerned with the 'destination' (as in 'yeh karne se kya fayda hoga') For them, there is a great deal of pleasure in the journey itself.

Of course, these foreign workers will round off the BPO experience with one grand 'Bharat darshan' in which they will see and do more than most of us have in our many long years of residence in this country.

I met a bunch of French exchange students here in Pondy. Their main objective was to travel the length and breadth of the country and that's what they managed - in the 3 short months they spent here. Now, students of many more nationalities come down - and they are, I'm told, actually attending classes.

Yet, I'm sure they're here mainly for 'cultural immersion' and not to get gyan and fundas from Indian school prof's.

Break ke baad
In the UK there is a concept known as 'Gap Year' - which is a 1 year break many students take between leaving school and joining college. Part of this year is often spent working - the money thus earned is used to finance a trip to India or Africa or south east Asia.

The more adventurous go further - a British boy l I know spent 2 months in a Kenyan village on a water harvesting project. Just for the experience, no pay.

In India, taking a year's break is still unheard of. Folks worry about being 'left behind' as their batch from school or college gets ahead in life. 'How will I explain it on my CV' is the other big question.

The idea that random, unpurposeful experiences can result in personal growth is still a new one for Indians. David Ogilvy, after flunking out of Oxford, held a succession of jobs, from chef at the Hotel Majestic in Paris to door-to-door salesman for Aga Cookers (a British oversized kitchen range) before he got his first job in advertising.

And I think all these experiences made him the creative genius we know him as today.

That's the way
Instead of a linear life path where we hop from KG class through school, college and then an MBA, you might want to consider adding a little zig to your zag.

I see a few young people doing it - there's a guy I know who's currently in Poland on an AIESEC exchange program. And a few who went to work at a BPO for a few months, just to know what the hype is all about.

But there still aren't enough such folks out there. There are only foreign backpackers in Rajasthan and Himachal and the rest of India.

It's not about 'not having enough money'. Because many of these firangs travel on shoestring budgets.

Perhaps Indians think they know 'enough' of India already and would rather explore foreign lands. Although villages in Bastar or Uttaranchal are more foreign to residents of Mumbai or Delhi than NY or London!

B School interview secrets

B school interviews are a favourite topic of posting and discussion on Indian blogs. There are entire e-groups dedicated to dissecting interview experiences. Then of course, there's the popular forum pagalguy where junta agonizes about why Ram was selected over Shyam, for no obvious reason.

What's rare is to hear from the other side of the table. What do these interview panels really look for? A senior lecturer in one of our colleges who was recently part of just such a panel at a well known Chennai B school has some of the answers.It was a nerve to understand the questions thrown and the way they are received. But, still there's a lot to be improved on either sides to come out of the hullaboo created by the interviewer and the interviewed.

Ladkiyan na jaane kyon........

The BBC reports that the University of Derby recently launched a games programming course - all 106 applicants were men. They are now holding some all-female summer schools, and exploring the options of scholarships in an attempt to persuade women that solitary hours in front of a computer screen can be good for their career prospects.

Acting programme leader, lecturer John Sear, said: "Girls do want to play games but no-one is making games for them. I'm a programmer by trade and I know probably several hundred, and I have only ever met one woman."


Car design is another such field. There was an interesting interview with Sanghamitra Datta, an NID graduate, on CNBC's Auto Show. Sanghamitra enrolled for a course in car designing at the University of Bristol where the first day was a huge shock.

There were Chinese, Japanese, Europeans, Africans - ALL boys. She was the sole female in the class which was kind of unnerving. But she went on to complete the course with flying colours and is now a full-fledged automobile designer.

So I guess it's multiple factors:
a) Certain fields inherently interest boys more. Action and speed (seen both in games and cars) are more exciting to Mars than Venus.
b) Derby university sees it as a "chicken and egg" problem - of boys writing games that boys liked playing, which in turn attracted boys into the industry.
c) The fact that there are no women in these fields often scares away the few women who might be interested. And so the cycle continues.

And I'm not blaming anyone here, just making an observation. If the traditionally male armed forces and the police can attract women, surely game design and car design will eventually see more female talent. And games with more use of mental skill than adrenalin rush and blood :)

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Leggy girls & Tiny man : new goodwill ambassadors of Nepal



Khagendra Thapa, who is expected to be the world's shortest man next month when he turns 18, stands for photo graphs with Miss Nepal 2010 Sadichha Shrestha (C), first runner-up Sahana Bajracharya (R) and second runner-up Sanyukta Timsina (L) during a news conference in Kathmandu, Nepal, Sept. 24, 2010. The Nepal Tourism Board has nominated Thapa and Miss Nepal beauty pageant winners as goodwill ambassadors to promote tourism in Nepal. Thapa will carry the message: "Shortest man in the world from the highest mountain in the world invites you to visit Nepal".

Sometimes life's like that. "Sab ko sab kuch nahi milta, kisi ko zameen toh kisi ko aasmaan nahi milta".

Must say : A Tiny man with a Big ATTITUDE

Friday, September 24, 2010

Shit can go hit

Sorry, folks. Despite being almost universally trashed Ravanan was officially a 'hit' in the south. Made with a budget of Rs 31 crores, Ravanan released with 400 prints and a 90% occupancy on the opening weekend.

A back-of-the-envelope calculation shows that Rs 13 crores could easily have been recovered on one single weekend alone given that:

400 screens X 9 shows over Fri-Sun X Rs 100 average ticket price (multiplexes charge more while others charge less) X 360 (assuming average hall size is 400 and there is 90% occupancy)

Bingo - you have Rs 12.96 crores.

I saw the movie on a Tuesday evening and the hall was pretty full which is great because whatever audience comes in after the first 3 days is pure profit.

Popcorn anyone?
The India Today calls it the 'popcorn' movie trend - films specially conceived and designed for the youth which, today, is the highest spending demographic.

'An Adlabs multiplex study says 50% if all footfalls belong to those between 18 and 30 years while a Shringar cinemas study last year showed that the 18-35 age segment is the biggest spender'.

So, films are being made to cater to this audience - right after Ravanan came Madarasapattinam which also, despite ok-ok reviews is being called a hit.

Given the sad state of the phillum industry even OK movies have a chance at the box office if they can create enough hype to get in the opening weekend audience. After that, if the film is bad it will quickly tank. If it's good - like Black and Page 3 - it goes the opposite way: Up!

Young people - and even older folks, families - are going to the movies because it is 'something to do'. In this country we don't have baseball games or ice hockey or any other weekend sporting events. We don't have a large pubbing or clubbing culture. We don't take off to jet ski or go sailing on weekends.

Leave aside a few of the super-rich who go to their farm houses and lie in hammocks. The only thing yuppie types can do to relax and unwind is eat, shop or watch movies. And you don't have much choice. Asked to choose between Ravanan and Madarasapattinam - I chose Ravanan. At least it had the famous Athirapally Falls - Maniratnam's preferred location in most of his movies right from Roja to Guru and now to Ravanan.

Young people often go to watch movies despite knowing they're bad because:
- Girlfriend ya boyfriend ke saath kahin jaana hai
- Group mein do log keh rahe hain - chalo dekh lete hain
- Even bad movies can be enjoyed by making fun of them

Either way no one is complaining!

Of Cats and Underdogs

Business Today is a magazine fond of making lists. Every issue features at least one 'top 10' something or the other. One issue (an old one i came across) had India's best mutual fund managers.

The intro stated: "Many are Indian Institute of Management (IIM) grads, others are Chartered Accountants (CAs) and a couple sport more esoteric degrees". I skimmed through the survey, more as anxiously as I could and here were the startling results.

The scorecard
FMS - 1
JBIMS - 2
NMIMS - 1
CAs - 2
unknown - 1
IIM Lucknow - 1

Unless the author of the intro meant "MBAs from premier institutes" - which included FMS and JBIMS - the IIM reference was actually misleading!

The 'esoteric' degrees the magazine referred to were basically MBAs from lesser known - actually unknown - institutes. There were 3 on the list, which was a statistically significant 30%. These included:

MBA Allahabad University
(Ashish Kumar, 35 - GM, LIC Mutual Fund)

MBA Bhopal University
( Rahul Goswami, 32 - Sr Fund Manager, Prudential ICICI AMC)

Hindu Institute of Management, Sonepat
( Sujoy Kumar Das, 32 - VP - DSP Merrill Lynch MF)

I wondered, a dozen years after graduating from IIM  - how much does the institute label matter? Well, to some, at the entry level - a hell of a lot. Many companies dont take MBAs outside the top few institutes through campus placements, so definitely you get a headstart.

But they do take in lateral recruits based on performance - and hence success stories like Sujoy, the Sonepat MBA who started his career with Bank of Punjab. And of course we all know this at some level - that in the end it's we as individuals who are responsible for our career graphs - regardless of which institute we graduate from.

But I'd just like to highlight this point, because I often meet young people who tried for IIMs, didn't make it and are now studying elsewhere. And feeling terrible about it. I want to say to all of you that 10 years from now it's really not going to matter. Although you may use it as an excuse to explain why you aren't doing as well as X, Y or Z.

Bottom line: It's what I call the cats and dogs theory at work in every field of life - not just MBA. The cats are the ones born with the silver spoons or who manage to enter institutes of a certain reputation. But the underdog can have his day - and often does.

There's Something about Maggi

It's been years and years and years having Maggi. Twisted yellow curlicues floating in a viscous brownish/yellowish sauce. Ideally consumed without peas or carrots or other sidey attempts at adding on "nutrition". What Maggi does best is fill tummies, especially the kind that are perennially growling - in hostels.

Maggi's ads always feature mummies and bachchalog but I bet a good deal of their sales come from hostel junta tired of aloo in its nth incarnation. If you've ever been subject to the vagaries of a hostel "mess" (which is what the food tastes like!), you'd agree Maggi is a gourmet option.

It says "noodles" right next to "2 Minutes" on the jhataak yellow pack but that's not strictly true. Maggi is Maggi and dhabas outside hostels take pains to specify that on their menu.

BITS Pilani makes a mean Maggi (with paneer), guaranteed to warm you up on a chilly desert night. Inmates of Sophia college hostel have been known to make Maggi on an electric iron coz that's the only instrument they have to "cook" with. So you see, Maggi is a sort of institution, despite the fact that they remind some people of what earthworms would look like swimming in garam masala!

Kuch ho gaya hai
The reason I'm inspired to write this ode is the recent introduction of Maggi "vegetable atta noodles". I tried them out and must say - they are surprisingly bakwaas.

It was way back in the 80's when Maggi was introduced by Nestle in India. I still remember having joined the Maggi Club wherein Nestle would conduct quizzes and various other competitions. The winning team and the runners up would be compensated by a carton full of Maggi Noodles or Maggi ketchup's. Hmm !! Impromptu modus operandi Nestle undertook to promote the brand that time. I still do relinquish the taste the original Maggi I had i.e.the taste of the first lot of Maggi which was distributed to students all over India in various schools by Nestle. The taste has not gone from my taste buds still. That was then.

I use the word 'surprisingly' because in the past the makers of Maggi have introduced several extremely sad line extensions. Such as: tomato flavour (yuck!) and chocolate flavour (yuckier!!). Brief abominations which the general public may not remember but I am alive to testify they did happen.

Both were good 'ideas' probably thrown up during focus group discussions with housewives. They just didn't taste good. Or go with the concept of noodles. The chocolate flavour, when cooked, was about twice as gross as Shefali Zariwala's post Kaanta Laga video.

Then, they introduced a 'Chinese' variant. Which was not all that bad except it was rarely available and had to be cooked differently (you boil the noodles and then add the tastemaker and some orange coloured oil).

I don't think think Maggi Chinese quite took off. It became one of those novelty products you try once but then don't like enough to keep buying.

People who really wanted 'Chinese' bought hakka noodles. And hostelers never warmed to it either.

In the interim the folks at Maggi got paranoid over rival "smoodles" and went and changed the recipe! Crores of rupees were spent to inform consumers they should use "2 cups of water" instead of "1 1/2" while cooking. Maybe the noodles even started tasting better but there was one big problem - it wasn't Maggi anymore!!!

Phir kya hua? They brought back good old as-we-know-it Maggi. Like Coke brought back its original formula. Like Kyunki Saas brought back Mihir. Like Channel [V] brought back Nonie and Trey (OK, they didn't ... but don't you wish???)

Old vs new
The new 'health bhi, taste bhi' Maggi gets thumbs up from mothers all over India. They're happy to be able to send Maggi in their children's tiffin box once a week without feeling any guilt.

Yes, the atta noodles are more filling and they don't leave an icky yellow residue in the pan. And from a purely taste point of view - they're better especially when children are concerned.

A whole new generation will probably grow up on atta noodles. But for me, the original 'yellow' Maggi will always be special. Maggi as comfort food. Maggi as a taste and smell which brings back many moods and memories. Maggi when you are starving - and there are no interesting leftovers - at 2 am.

May both continue to prevail!

End of (unpaid) promo.

India Fashion Weak

Another Lakme India Fashion Week came and went by. Here's what I think it ultimately boils down to...

All the world's a ramp,
And all the men metrosexual and women size 6...

To the lay viewer - or 'consumer' as she is popularly known - that's what Lakme India Fashion Week (LIFW) looks like...

Designer Narendra Kumar's collection is inspired by the MMS scandal. Shantanu and Nikhil are inspired by the Sikh religion. Wendell Rodricks is inspired by the untouched people of the world's islands. No one, but no one, is inspired by the idea of clothing the modern - not model - Indian woman.

If genius is 1 per cent inspiration and 99 per cent perspiration, so is wearable fashion. The fashion fraternity is excellent at the first, hopeless at the second. It is the local tailors and boutiquewaalis who put in the sweat. These folks follow Fashion Week keenly, adapt an element here and an idea there to make clothing that women, with good money to spend, will buy.

But this doesn't matter to the designer darzi. No sir, we design for the international market. Didn't you know LIFW now attracts foreign buyers - the kind with authentic white skin?

Nightmares on Bollywood street

Slasher flicks are a genre Hollywood created especially for the teen audience. Specifically, the 'date movie' crowd who came into theaters more to hang onto each other than the storyline.

The film which started the trend is thought to be Halloween (1978) - but it had relatively little blood and not that many dead bodies. Friday the 13th is what really set the 'standard' and sparked off a spate of horror flicks.

'Nightmare on Elm Street' was my first slasher film I saw. I remember seeing it at the now-defunct Picture Palace cinema when I was in class 9. A large part of the thrill lay in watching an 'A' film as an under-18.

Of course, over the long run greed resulted in stretching both the 'Friday and 'Nightmare' franchises to breaking point. A rash of yucky sequels all but killed the horror genre.

Then, Wes Craven (the guys behind the Elm Street series) made a huge comeback with 'Scream'. The new genre of horror packed in not just blood and unnecessary sex scenes but a sly sense of irony. The audience already knew what to expect - and the director acknowledged that by poking fun at the standard 'horror film' plot devices.

The Indian slasher flick

In India, 'horror' has long been associated with pyaasi aatmas put on screen by Ramsay brothers. Low budget, cheap special-effect films which scared nobody, least of all the sophisticated urban youth audience.

But, as Bollywood was forced to look beyond its standard formulas to attract the multiplex audience, it looked to Hollywood for inspiration. And 'horror' was one seemingly underexploited genre.

So, Ekta Kapoor produced 'Kucch to Hai' - it flopped. Kajol's sister Tanisha made her debut with 'Sshhh... koi hai' - it flopped. Then, writer-director Soham released 'Kaal' - with the blessings of Karan Johar & SRK. Going by the buzz that the film created- it wasn't a major hit.

What went wrong?

Great Expectations
The audience was hungry for 'something new', that's for sure. But film makers are underestimating their intelligence. Ekta cleanly ripped off 'I Know what you did last summer' - a movie which is a regularly re-run on TV. 2 reels into the film and you knew exactly who the killer was. So where was the fun?

Same with 'Shhh.. Koi hai', which ripped of 'Scream' but with none of the style of the original. It was, however, superior to Ekta's efforts in the technical department.

Then came 'Kaal' which I must commend for at least trying to be original, although loosely it was a Jurassic-Park-meets-Sixth-Sense.

The photography, sound effects and atmosphere building was brilliant. The casting was good - you felt a lot more interested in the fate of the characters than in the other two films. And thankfully, there were no songs spoiling the flow.

Yet, the film met with less-than-exciting reviews and a lukewarm response from the audience.

I think the 'Karan Johar' association had created the wrong kind of expectations. This just wasn't his brand of film.

On top of that, maybe to 'sell' and to have something to air in promos there were two item numbers ghusaofied in the beginning and end of the film when credits roll. These had nothing to do with the film and again, created the wrong expectations in the audience.

Yes, the film was predictable. A bunch of friends in a jungle with man-eating tigers supposedly on the prowl. They had to die one by one, the lesser known the actor, the earlier his or her demise. The surprise element had to come with the way in which each one died - and the final denouement. The problem was, that surprise was lacking.

The 'enlightened' viewer had already figured out the ending. The less sophisticated viewer thought 'yeh to National Geographic channel lag raha hai' and never fully involved with the goings-on.

I say this because I saw 'Kaal', with a mixed crowd of papajis, auntyjis, newlyweds and young people. Half an hour before the movie ended, patience was lost. When Esha Deol went to fetch water from a well she's been warned to stay away from, a smart alec shouted, "Sunny Deol ko bhejo - behen ko bachaane ke liye". More hoots, comments and giggles followed. The film had lost it.

All about emotion
I think the classic 'slasher' flick fails primarily because people feel no emotional involvement with the characters.

Maybe Indians just don't like pointless blood and gore. Blood spilt to save one's family honour or beat up evil goondas is fine, but to just kill for the fun of it (which is the essence of a slasher film) is a very alien concept.

Psychological suspense thrillers have worked - like Raaz. A one-woman centric film like 'Bhoot' worked. Neither had bodies piled up, so technically they aren't 'slasher' films anyways. But certainly Bhoot was scary... In fact it is the scariest Hindi film I have seen (and I mean that as a compliment).

Bottomline: Bollywood is on the right track - that of exploring new kinds of films. I guess they will just have to try harder to come up with more original and inventive plots - whatever the genre they choose to attack. In all other departments, they are pretty much at par with Hollywood.

And yeah, maybe there just isn't that large a 'date movie' audience. Yet.

The Physics of Buzz

Here's my two bits.

Call it vibe or buzz or whatever you will. What you're feeling at a high profile place like the disc or a PVR on a Saturday night is a convergence of collective emotional energy. And emotion, like the common cold - is extremely contagious.

But how did that energy get there in the first place? Let me try and use a well-loved equation to explain it: E = m c squared

Where E = emotional energy or 'buzz'
M = Mood
C = confluence X 'charge'

Sounds vague, huh. What is this 'charge'.

Well, charge is different things at different times, but essentially it's heightened expectations of ... something.

At a stadium before a cricket match it's the anticipation of seeing Tendulkar batting, of hoping he won't be out for a duck and the uncertainty of not knowing what the outcome will be. Except that you have 8 hours ahead of a jolly good time.

At an extremely popular and frequented place, it's the anticipation of bumping into interesting people, places to shop, eat and hang out, essentially hubs which attract diverse individuals - some trendsetters and some good old ordinary folk.

The Origin of Buzz

It might start with a single such individual setting up shop - one where the business and culture in some way collide ie generally, a trendy new restaurant, clothing shop, music store, lounge bar - something that is instantly recognized to have that intangible quality called 'cool'.

Purely on word-of-mouth, the 'cool', good-looking, confident patrons will start coming in. All of those attributes are generally available to those with time and money to spend, whose concept of life has moved beyond survival or worrying about the future - to a constant search for 'what's new and exciting'. By definition these people are mostly young or at the least youthful.

Not every cool business instantly results in the development of a hub. It takes time - and suitability of location.
As more and more interesting establishments open up, the place becomes a hub - and attracts more and more interesting people. All of whom come with a certain air of expectancy 'of having a good time' which charges the atmosphere. When that charge develops critical mass - the air acquires a buzz.

Over a longer period of time, it's not the original trendsetters ie the commercial or cultural establishments which maintain the buzz - it's just the people. Many popular places- though stagnant in terms of new and exciting things to do is buzzing just because of the folks who are attracted to come hang out there.

A large number of backpackers - thanks to the Lonely Planet guidebook recommendations - and street hawkers who sell cheerful and cheap imbue excitement and newness - an experience that's different every time.

A tale of 2 cities
At a macro level, cities have a 'buzz'. Because they create heightened expectations. The migrant from Bihar arrives in Mumbai having heard that 'no one can starve to death here'. The streetlights/ paved roads/ tall buildings - all build up in him the anticipation of a 'good life'. Or at least one that is better than what was left behind.

The MBA who comes to the city to take up his or her first job has a similar set of expectations about 'Bombay life'. The important thing is that Bombay some unique characteristics which are not 'Marathi', 'Gujarati' or specific to any one community. Or India, in general. eg People in Bombay are always in a hurry - which in itself might be creating some 'buzz'.

Similarly, a city like New York attracts people from all over America - and the world (ie confluence) - all arriving with a heightened sense of expectation of something. 'Making it big', drinking in culture, being more 'free' than they were in Athens, Georgia where all 3000 residents meddle in each other's lives from baptism to funeral.

Can it be generated?
Knowing all this, can one 'create' a buzz? Perhaps. Singapore is trying hard.. though honestly it's not as buzzing as a Hong Kong which got there through the process of natural evolution.

I think the best you can do is try and assemble the elements and hope they spontaneously combust. The challenge is to go a step further, and figure out how to light the matchstick.

Train of thought II

For as long as I can remember, Bombay has been admired for its fast and efficient local trains. Out-of-town visitors are struck by the speed and efficiency of the suburban train network.

But, sadly, those who live and work in the city - and can afford to do so - are slowly shifting to the roads. Not to buses, but their own cars.

Why? Because although no one enjoys Bombay road traffic, doing so in the air conditioned comfort of your own car, tuned to your favorite FM station is the only alternative you have. Even the so-called 'first class' is now not much better than cattle class.

So, why haven't the railways upgraded their coaches? For the last 10 years we've been hearing of the introduction of a/c coaches (there's an announcement to that effect once again). But in the 'interest of the common man' (who is hanging on for dear life from the ordinary compartments) things never move forward.

Class apart
Anyone who has taken a ride on the Delhi metro will see what taking care of the interest of the common man really means. A global-standard metro service is available to all the city's residents. Have been through both these trains so there's depth in what i say about both of these.

A ticket from Rohini to Kashmere Gate (a dozen stops away) costs a mere Rs 12! (A short distance first class ticket on our comparatively khatara Mumbai local is Rs 50).

 Delhi metro is already fairly popular. Since the launch of the stretch connecting Connaught Place has started, its use has skyrocketed. In the longer run, with Gurgaon and Noida connected more and more car owners will be tempted to switch over.

The Mumbai local, in contrast, is driving people in the opposite direction. Of course, 18 year olds don't drive to college - in Mumbai. At that stage of life, public transport rules.

But a few short years later, into your second or third job, you take a car loan. Initially, it's to use only on weekends. Then, you take it to work occassionally. By and by, you get addicted to the comfort. The same locals which you swore by earlier is too squishy and sweaty to travel by.

Similarly, once you 'move' even further up in life, you employ a driver. Then, the task of driving to work on days when the fellow is on leave becomes a pain.

Aaj kal aur kal
Man is a creature of habit and once he acquires a new one it's hard to shake off. Things which were an accepted part of life at 20 feel like hardships at 30!

That's because while there may have been less creature comforts at 20, you had so many intangible assets at the time. The long and continuous company of friends. The freedom that comes with student life. The hope of great things to come.

By 30, you may technically be a 'youth' but your time is not your own. Most of it is mortgaged to your employer.In return, you may be paid a good deal of money. This money then is used to buy back some time. And add some layers of comfort.

Because in our heads we may remain young for many more years - even decades - than previous generations. But, the hectic lifestyles we lead quickly start taking a toll on our bodies.

Bottomline: When travelling like animals in local trains is no longer an acceptable standard in public life, neither will living in a 1 room shanty or shitting on tracks. That's when we can start thinking of becoming a Shanghai or a Singapore.

Recent reports suggest that work on a metro train service connecting Ghatkopar and Versova/ Colaba and Charkop is about to begin.

About time - definitely!

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Train of thought

I write this post from Peaceful Puducherry - the land of the French in India right from pre-independence days till date.It is a 48 hour train journey from Udaipur (my home town) and whichever way I look at it, that's 48 hours too many. So I fly to Ahmedabad from Madras - and even though the airfares available are cheaper now - it ends up more than twice as expensive as 2nd a/c.

That wasn't how it was supposed to be - budget airlines were supposed to make flying just a little more expensive than "luxury" train fare. Leave aside Air Deccan's few cheap tickets (which, like rail must be booked months in advance).

Flying within India remains an expensive proposition - and yet more of us are doing it today - not just for business, but pleasure and in fulfillment of social obligations.

Why fly

We're doing it because time is money. And time spent in trains watching the scenery go by is not just boring but wasteful.

But, more fundamentally, there is a new breed of Indians who just can't stand personal discomfort. Not to say that flying is absolutely stress-free - it's not, especially given the state of our airports. But the maximum you'll spend trapped with an irritating co-passenger is 2 hours.

Railways are a different story. You are trapped in a compartment with a medley of people. If you're travelling alone you'll invariably have to 'adjust' and exchange seats so Bablu and family can all sit together. If you don't get there early you'll have to wage war to get suitcase space.

There are those who eat non-stop and those who talk non-stop (even after lights go off). Then there are kids who wail and uncles who snore. And of course using the loo in the morning...

The scene I am describing is of the Indian Railways with hordes jumping in without reservation along the way.

Yet, I find in the last one year since I took the Great Mental Leap ('what the heck, let's fly') it's become increasingly difficult to contemplate a long distance train journey.  

Attitude Shift
The train --> plane shift is increasingly being made by customers in search of 'fluxury' or functional luxury. Which is different from those who buy something because it confers them 'status'.

I happily wear a cheap though funky plastic watch - not a Tag or Esprit - because a watch is a watch is a watch. The 300 buck one tells time as well as the 10,000 one - and you can throw it away and get a new one every 6 months.

Similarly, a 'fluxury' seeking customer will upgrade his or her mobile phone in search of certain features - like a Blackberry or PDA and not just for its 'flaunt' status - or cool looks.

I could be wrong, but it seems like much of young India is thinking this way. It's therefore harder to sell on the strength of 'labels' alone in this country.

Young people are happy to wear the cheaper substitute - and without embarassment. You see this particularly in the case of say, jeans. Yes, I need to own a couple of well known brand name pairs but beyond that junta shops for specific styles. Most important, if it fits well, it will sell.
 
The Road Ahead
Getting back to the question of train vs plane, the Railways have enough Indians still clamouring for tickets to miss my custom. And with our large population - will continue to do so.

But assuming the grand plans for more airports - and also better, high speed roads - actually bear fruit... As far as young and upwardly mobile India is concerned - 20 years from now - trans-India railway journeys will be romantic relics of the past.

Raat baaki

"Indians are sleeping less" - according to a recent cover story in India Today.

A study by AC Nielsen reveals that 46% of Indians sleep less than 6 hours a day. And 64% apparently wake up prior to 7 am - among the highest in the world.

Well, I belong to the 64% group happily. Not as extreme as Ekta Kapoor - she apparently sleeps only after 4 am and that too for just 5 hours. But yes, I do love my nights.

Night is when I get to watch TV/ surf the net/ read in peace. And write, too. It's when I feel a sense of space and freedom in a house - and life - I share with my wife.

The late shift
When I was in school, I remember 10 o'clock was standard bedtime. 11 o'clock was considered LATE. There was an alarm clock- cum-radio next to my bed and sometimes I'd lie awake till 11.30 - till Vividh Bharati's last transmission - and feel quite cool.

Today, kids are routinely awake till 11 pm in many Indian homes. Parents come home late from work, for one. If you leave at 8 am and return at 9 pm - when will your child see you at all, if he sleeps by old English timings?

Then there's 24 hour TV - you stay awake to watch inane movies or just randomly channel surf. For young people, late night is about the only time the remote is in their independent possession. Because prime time means saas bahu serials for moms and NDTV/ CNBC for dads. And not many homes - yet - have two TVs.

If you're the kind who now works for a living, late night TV viewing is kind of like unwinding. You hope - in those 100 channels - something will seduce you, reduce the mental exhaustion of the day gone by.

Ditto for net-surfing.

Nights are for man-made pleasures like clubbing while early mornings are for natural ones like walks in parks. You may not be the partying type, but if you're a young person - chances are you prefer the buzz of the night.

This, of course, may not be a matter of choice for many of the kids who are in an engineering or MBA hostels where nobody sleeps before 2 am.   

Bottomline: There is a mysterious, somewhat kinky pleasure to staying up late. Ask yourself, why did India awake to light and freedom at the stroke of the midnight hour... Not 6 am?

Porn Free

Did you know that 90% of cybercafe clients visit porn sites.
And, that 50% of them are minors?

That's what the Asian Age reported, quoting a survey conducted by media consultant N Ravindran which covered 65 cybercafes in Mumbai.

"Of the 350 students we interviewed, most were students between the age of 9-14."


Apparently the younger kids come in groups while those above 15 prefer to watch porn by themselves. Cybercafe owners turn a blind eye because - well, it's good business!

So much for closure of dance bars.
 
Girls just don't wanna...

An important point to note is that "only a handful of girls watch porn, compared to boys".

I'm not surprised, because the 'blue film' industry is primarily geared towards men.

I guess I'm too old to be disgusted... just puzzled that people (read men) will pay money (more than once) to watch this freakshow.

Strangely enough, a quote from staid old 'Readers Digest' I read last time hits the nail on the head.

Says Dr Phil (of Oprah fame): "Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears." The same, I think, is true of lust!

The IIT Bubble

"An academic institution should not be known just for its undergraduates. It should be known for the kind of knowledge base it creates, the quality of research that it does. We need to really pull up our socks otherwise it will be not long before the IIT bubble bursts."

This is what S G Dhande, director, IIT Kanpur had to say in an interview to Tehelka, the people's paper (issue dt Apr 09). He couldn't have put it better.

Although I don't think the 'bubble will burst' - because the goodwill its graduates have earned over the last 4 decades is formidable - certainly IITs have a long way to go. IITians who go to MIT for PG courses excel as individuals but IIT as an institution is nowhere near an MIT in terms of original research.

Dhande believes the spark of creativity and originality of thinking needed for top quality research is missing because IITians are given a completely unidimensional education.

"Knowledge is increasingly becoming inter-disciplinary... Biology is the flavour of the century. We need to delve into all these areas even though we call ourselves a technology institute".

The director relates the story of a faculty member at IIT asking the first year students which novel they had read in the past one year.

There was a stunned silence.
"Where is the time to read novels?" they asked.


Dhande's answer is to start exposing students to design and art, as well as set up a TV studio on campus, a community based FM radio station and start a journalism club. Sounds like fun - with official sanction.

Curiously, in August 2004, IIT Bombay witnessed a sudden cancellation of all cultural and sports activities.  The Performing Arts festival and Socials (a theater event) were scaled down to reduce the number of man hours spent on them... The Dean expressed his concern over the the new bodies and clubs cropping up and demanded a 'vision' behind all these activities".

I don't know what the situation is right now, but obviously there is difference of opinion among the powers-that-be in the IIT family!

Jo JEEta wahi...
According to tehelka, at a March 5 meeting of the standing commitee of the IIT council, it was agreed that the present level of JEE is so high that students have to undergo strenuous coaching - which can be as long as 4 years. A proposal to change the examinations pattern is being considered.

Most likely, JEE will revert to from the current 2 stage process which was introduced a few years ago, to one examination from 2006-7. It was also felt that the exam should be 'more simple' and based on class 12 syllabus.

Well and good. However this bit is disturbing: "Performance in the Board exams may be used as criteria for determining eligibility."

Would this mean only those who score above 85 or 90% can attempt JEE? When will they give the exam - after their results are out?

No doubt the current situation sucks. A single coaching institute - Bansal classes in Kota - sent 827 students to IIT (I kid you not - that was their success rate in the year 2004).

Getting into Bansal (which calls itself 'modern gurukul for IIT JEE) itself has become so tough that someone will need to start a coaching class for that. Maybe there already is one?

But determining eligibility via Board Exams - that can't be the answer. Maybe the JEE should be based more along the lines of the SAT - where basic aptitude/ IQ is measured. But of course in colleges abroad the SAT is used along with subjective criteria like essays, recommendations and student's past academic and extra curricular record.

Which is unlikely to happen here.

Bottomline: At least serious thought is being paid to these issues - even if there is no magic solution. Which is better than IITs just sitting back and feeling complacent about being 'world class'.

Bonus: If IIT truly gets multi-disciplinary, they may - someday- transcend the image ingrained in the public mind - that of the Ultimate Nerd!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Sciontology II

If your dad owned a major Indian company, would you still travel by a local bus to college? Well, Ranbaxy heirs Malvinder and Shivinder Singh did just that. Even when U special buses were stoned during the Mandal Commission protests, daddy didn't offer 'take the BMW instead.'

This, and more, was revealed in an interesting conversation with Shobha De on "Power Trip" aired on Sahara One - a channel I would normally not be caught dead watching.

The difference between a 'coat-tailer', as described in my previous post and inheritors who've taken the family legacy forward can be summed up in a single word: 'values'.

Those who had it too easy in life, and too comfortable, are doomed to remain dabblers. Those who were brought up to realise the value of money - despite having so much of it - are programmed to succeed.

'Modesty Blaze'
Take the example of Kumarmanglam Birla. I have, personally, experienced how lightly he wears his family name on his shoulders.

The difference between Kumarmangalam and the son or daughter of a Johnny-come-lately is humility. When you've already arrived you don't have to throw your weight around. Or attract undue attention to yourself. You let your work speak for itself.

On the other hand, there's Yash of 'Yash and Avanti Birla' fame....

Takes all kinds - and hair colours - to make up the coat-tailer universe!

Sciontology

27 year old Zorawar Kalra planned to sell paranthas and rolls from carts at shopping malls. According to Business Today, he got this brainwave after seeing cups of steamed corn selling like hotcakes at the same venue.

So Kalra set up 'The Royal Parantha Company" and sunk in Rs 12 lakh to set up a state-of-the-art central kitchen in Mehrauli, from where he shipped out the paranthas to franchisees in frozen form.

Zorawar's dad is the well known food consultant Jiggs Kalra and he's a graduate of Boston's Bentley Business University. Being an MBA, Kalra ostensibly studied the market situation and thought he had a winning idea. Definitely, I think there is a demand. Success will depend on how well can he execute the supply.

But Kalra is just one example of a new breed of young people. What I call the 'coat-tailers'.

Coat-tailers are the kids of parents who have it all. Statistically they are a small % but very visible in the media. eg Kids of actors, politicians, industrialists and the miscellaneous well-known.

They have had no pressures to perform well academically, or had to put much thought to their careers. Their career is to prepare themselves to inherit the family legacy. There is no shame in this. They are generally educated abroad but aspire to return home, not settle there permanently.

Coat tailers can go thru life doing nothing - there's already a house, car and spending money and Indian parents will support their kids for life. But it's not fashionable to sponge off your parents forever, coat tailers do aspire to make some sort of personal contribution. It's just that they can afford to think longer about what they want, and even fail at a few things.

Characteristics of coat-tailers
 
Kids of: Celebrities, successful Westernised professionals, Businessmen of standing

Attitude: We've always had the best, because we can afford it.

Parental expectation: Do what you want, what makes you happy. If u need a leg up, I'm around.

Aspiration in Education: Foreign Univ from undergrad level, if not definitely a Foreign MBA.
The ranking of the university is not key - Bentley for example is um, nowehere in the Businessweek top 50 but is still $ 80,000 well spent as far the coat-tailer is concerned. Who needs a placement?

What kids do: Drifting around for some time after education is OK. Eventually they know they will join the family business or profession.

However they do aspire to make a difference in the longer run, do things differently. When that does not happen they feel lack of purpose and meaning in life.

Emerging Trend
Coat tailers whose families are into the more traditional, boring businesses are striking out into more exciting areas eg nightspots, clothing stores, media, something-to-do-with-entertainment etc. These ventures are often aimed at "People Like Us", and modelled on similar concepts seen on foreign trips.

Usually the family will help fund their ideas. The new business may not contribute that much to family bottomline but keeps the young person busy and out of trouble, also may give boost to image.

Bottomline: At the very least, coat-tailers - who bring us fancy new restaurants and convert their boring mill lands into cool malls - make the world a better place for us lesser mortals.

If some of their ventures end up in the red - so be it. Call it adventures in angel investing - where the angel is actually our father, not in heaven, but yon planet earth.

Do or diet

"I have not touched bread, rice or even roti for the last 4 years. I can't even remember the last time I had a roti. My diet consists mainly of fruits and vegetables. Almost throughout the day I have a glass of juice, either carrot/ orange/ watermelon or a glass of coconut water."
- Bollywood actor Ayesha Takia, speaking to Sunday Midday

She is only some movies old. But this actor surely adds a new meaning to the phrase "hungry to succeed". If her diet is anything to go by...

And oh, she does 2 hours of aerobics every day.

What do we, lesser mortals, infer after reading such interviews? That we should be grateful to be ordinary and less-than-perfect .

We don't have to deprive ourselves of sev puri, pav bhaji and gooey chocolate cake.
Or atone for the sins of eating the same by vomiting it all out later.

Here's a great idea for a Reality Show:
Lock the models at Lakme India Fashion Week in a room full of real food.
Then, watch them struggle into those slinky clothes.
Should be a riot :)

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

LA..IRA..ILA... - no more

The channel is Star World.
The background is white.
A metrosexual type man, a foreign looking woman.
She has a blood red mirchi in her mouth.
He is licking drops of water off her back.

Instinctively, I finger-flick to another channel. It could be an ad for some fancy perfume. On the other hand, it could be a condom.

Children sit right in front of the idiot box and then later want to deal with their never-ending questions.

Sex education is essential but we don't need a child prodigy in that particular area.

A few seconds later I flick back and to my shock, it's an ad for LIRIL soap. Um, what exactly were they thinking???

Goodbye waterfall
So, the girl and the waterfall became repetitive and boring. The success of the brand became a millstone around its neck.

They tried girls dancing in deserts, on glaciers and even an orange variant. It must not have worked, so they decided to do something drastic.

"The new Liril Soft Aloe Vera and Lemon campaign focused on naughty intimacies among married couples instead of the erstwhile iconic `waterfall' campaigns, " notes Hindu Businessline.

Why this won't work
A brand - like a city - is built on a certain heritage.
Yes, it can be tweaked to a certain extent but if you want to simply throw it ALL away, why not just launch a new brand. Why use the name Liril at all?

a) The ad looked/ felt/ jingle was not Liril. There was some la la la going on in the background (I think) but not evocative of the original tune at all.

b) Selling point was no longer freshness but lemon + aloe vera ie freshness plus soft, supple skin.

As a soap, it may have been quite nice actually (the packaging and shape looked interesting) but it was not LIRIL.

Secondly, the 'married' couple bit did not come across. Which married couple in India looks/ behaves like THAT?

Thirdly, what was this obsession with fair skinned/ light eyed models? How was the Indian consumer supposed to identify with the situation??

Lastly, the red mirchi made absolutely no sense. Was the soap fresh, or hot?

For all those reasons, I thought the ad would bomb. Reminded me of the classic 'new Coke' fiasco which actually led to the old Coke being brought back with a vengeance! Bet the old girl under the waterfall would have made a similar comeback in 6 months time...

Phir bhi
I must however commend Hindustan Lever for taking the risk of doing something different. That particular attempt might have failed but some of their other advertising experiments were worth noting.

The 'do bucket paani hai bachaana' campaign for Surf and the Lifebuoy ads where kids could clean up their neighbourhood were both very bold departures from conventional soap/ detergent advertising. They were in fact what you might call 'socially relevant'.

These ads were being noticed - and achieving a positive impact. An impact which could, eventually, get reflected in sales figures. But probably didn't - in the short run.

Which meant things would have soon be back to 'safedi ki jhankaar' type advertising.

Sometimes I wonder what would happen if soap/ detergent advertising was banned from television for a year. Would we stop buying and become filthy/ unhygienic cretins?